You've been invited to a wedding. You go shopping and buy something nice to wear and your job is done. All that is left to do is attend the wedding and reception. But there is much more to it than just that. There are actually rules that you should read up on. It will determine whether you'll be remembered as a pleasant guest or THAT guest. Wedding Wire did a survey and asked 800 guests rules that they know they have broken at weddings. So I will add some of the percentages throughout the post. Read on to see the correct etiquette for attending a wedding and reception.
RSVPing
Simple enough, just RSVP. And RSVP on time. It may not seem important to you and you may think to yourself that one RSVP not returned won't make or break their wedding. Well, actually it is important. This helps the couple determine the amount of food they will need. It will also help the couple from having to track you down and ask if you are attending or not. It will also minimize their stress level of knowing how many guests to expect. Don't Assume You Can Bring A Date If you receive an invitation and it says your name but does not say "+1" or "and guest" then you'll have to attend solo. Also, don't contact the bride or groom asking if it's okay if you bring a guest. The couple isn't being rude by not allowing you to bring a guest, typically it's just not in their budget for anyone extra to attend. Wedding Wire found during their survey that 9% of people brought a guest even though it was not on the invitation. Wedding Attire The first thing to remember is not to one up the bride or groom or distract from them. But definitely don't look like you are making a casual trip to Wal-Mart. So unless the wedding invitation says jeans are okay, don't wear jeans. There are a few rules when deciding on something to wear to a wedding. First, don't wear white. Second, you can wear black to a wedding. I suggest dressing it up with some jewelry. Third, take into account where the wedding is taking place at. If it's in a Catholic church, dress appropriately.
Silence Your Phone
There are times when it's just plain obvious to silence your phone and when you're attending a wedding this should be one of those times. Crazy enough, guests don't. A few of the weddings I have been the photographer at, this has happened. And while it may give everyone a little laugh it still is a rude. Wedding Wire found out that 8% of guests have had their phone ring while attending a wedding. Don't Bring Your Gift To The Wedding It's actually common these days to not bring a gift to the wedding. And definitely don't bring a big gift. The main reason being that the last thing the couple wants to mess with after their reception is trying to figure out how to get a bunch of gifts home. The best idea is to send your wedding gift to the couple prior to their wedding. Most of the places if not all that the couple register at have the option to send the gift directly to the couple. Leave The Photography To The Professional Whether the couple lets you know their wedding is unplugged, meaning they do not want any phones, tablets, cameras, or any other digital devices being used during their wedding, you should assume they want the photographer that they hired and paid a good amount of money for to take their pictures. It can be distracting and you may get in the way of the photographer or if you have your flash on, it may interfere with the photographers photos. Over 50% of guests took photos during a ceremony, 27% posted the photos on social media while the ceremony was going on. Don't Overdo It On The Alcohol Drunk obnoxious people are annoying period but being a drunk obnoxious person at a wedding reception is just disrespectful. Even if it's your best friend getting married, which probably means you may be in the wedding, you are still a guest and should act as such. Wedding Wire's survey found that 17% of guests drank too much. If There Is Assigned Seating Then Follow It The couple took the time to make a seating chart so please follow it. Creating a seating arrangement is not an easy task. If there are a lot of people then designing a seating chart probably took quite a bit of time to plan out. You will be able to get up and mingle with everyone once the dinner is over. Have you broken any of these rules? Did any of these happen at a wedding you attended or even happen at you wedding? Let me know in the comments!
27 Comments
Michelle
4/2/2018 12:16:37 pm
I love these great tips, especially the one with wearing appropriate attire and alcohol. Had some family members sneak alcohol at our wedding event though we didn't want them to.
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Kirsten
4/2/2018 09:58:08 pm
It seems like there is always that one group of people who just can't listen. I hope they didn't ruin your wedding!
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4/2/2018 12:18:31 pm
What a great, comprehensive list! The gift one was interesting -- I think it hasn't caught on yet in the midwest, but I like it! And oh my gosh, yes, RSVP. For crying out loud, please RSVP!!!
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Kirsten
4/2/2018 10:00:53 pm
Yeah, I had never heard about the gift one either until I did research for this blog post. And I agree about it not catching on in the Midwest because I'm in Indiana and I see people bring gifts or a card still. The RSVP thing is a pet peeve no matter what type of event but a wedding....duh!!!
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It makes me crazy when people don't RSVP, whether a wedding, party or anything! It's just common courtesy when people ask for a response. I also agree with the pictures. While I will take some pictures at the reception, I usually ask the bride/groom if they mind if I post pics after the event, or wait until after they post the first ones.
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Kirsten
4/2/2018 10:03:02 pm
No matter what the event people should ALWAYS RSVP. Especially a wedding! Drives me crazy! I'm glad to hear that you ask the couple, very respectful. Sounds like you would be a great guest! =)
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Kirsten
4/2/2018 10:06:40 pm
Oh, I know! I see a lot of girls wearing the shortest dress possible. Kind of blows my mind. That's a good tip too about not wearing the wedding colors unless you are apart of the wedding.
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Kirsten
4/9/2018 10:32:15 am
Glad to hopefully help! ;)
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Kirsten
4/9/2018 10:33:46 am
Thank you.
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Kirsten
4/9/2018 10:36:20 am
Thank you! I hope it helps!
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Kirsten
4/9/2018 11:04:05 am
I literally laughed out loud! I've honestly always seen guests bring gifts, which is actually usually a card. But it does make total sense that they have enough to worry about and getting all the gifts home would be one less worry.
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Kirsten
4/9/2018 11:08:44 am
Thank you! I'm glad to hear that you are a great guest! =)
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Kirsten
4/9/2018 11:11:51 am
Thank you!
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Kirsten
4/9/2018 11:20:36 am
Thanks!!
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Kirsten
4/9/2018 11:28:00 am
Yeah, if I had to choose my biggest annoyances those 2 would be at the top of my list. Thank you.
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Kirsten
4/9/2018 11:30:54 am
Thank you! Yes, if people can just follow a few rules all is well!
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